Negotiating Your Needs
Negotiation is a process that meets various interests and needs. Should you ask for what you want anyway? Should you consider company policy and ask to be exempt? Are there any other negotiables you need to reconsider? These are each important questions to consider when you stary negotiating for something you want.
In negotiations that really matter, or merely receiving a discount at a store or an extra appetizer not on the menu, our negotiation strategy should always be threefold. Assess yourself, assess the situation and assess your strategy. When you’re thoughtful about negotiations that matter, you are more likely to be prepared and create a win-win situation. Assess your style. We all have a negotiation personality style, but still can emphasize different traits, depending on the situation.
Three Different Styles of Negotiating:
The Diplomat:
Diplomats are known to lose battles so that they can win wars. If the focus is on conceding to the other person’s needs, or building the relationship with your boss, being a diplomat may help you in the long run. The diplomats will be:
- Among the group of attentive listeners,
- Bringing a softer approach to a negotiation,
- Tolerant of opinions different than one’s own,
- Naive to focus on their own interests and priorities and therefore self-discounting at times.
The Warrior:
In negotiation situations where the relationship stakes are low, it’s fun to be a warrior. For example, buying a car or a house, where you are the customer and you could walk away at any time. The warriors know their needs:
- They stay focused on the task at hand,
- They are not distracted by the drama and emotion of a situation,
The Cooperator:
Unlike the diplomat, the cooperator will not give more than it takes, but will find value for both parties involved. Being a cooperator may be more appropriate when you’re dealing with colleagues and customers. The cooperator finds:
- Maximum value in every negotiation,
- Makes sure each parties get their fair share.
Are you approaching the right person?
Sometimes the person you negotiate with is not the one equipped to make the decision. Starting a conversation about something they cannot change is not worth your time. Consider approaching them for advice, and use it to take your ask to the right person. Gather information. When you walk into a negotiation, you need to already have all the facts. Do your homework, look for comparison data. For example, if you’re comparing travel days with another department, ask people about past history of similar negotiations so that you can be better prepared.
Assess your strategy during negotiating:
Take some time to think of the level of trust you have with the other party. The higher the trust, the more you will be able to disclose. The lower the trust, the more information you should keep to yourself. Take the temperature of the scene. Is this a time where others are making similar asks? Is this the right time in the day, the week, the quarter to be making this ask? Has the person you’re negotiating with been overwhelmed with other requests, or is he or she under stress? Truthfully this doesn’t matter if you’re negotiating for a change in your mobile phone plan, but it’s crucial when thinking of client- and work-related situations.
Look to past history. Was your last negotiation with this person a successful one? Did it build the relationship, or was this a one-time ask? Depending on the situation you can be flexible on the negotiation style you use. Consider what’s in it for them.When you approach someone with their benefit in mind, they’re more likely to be open to your idea. Even when you’re asking your boss for a raise, and you can highlight the value you bring to the department’s overall success, or the ways that you make their work easier.
Consider your approach:
Self-awareness can help us better prepare for the actual interaction and tailor our approach using these options. Assess the situation. As you enter in a negotiation, know exactly what is the most important part of your ask. You need to know what you will be flexible about, what you’ll give up, and what are your non-negotiables. All this is essentially important in negotiation, raises, work schedules, and contracts.
If you tend to be a diplomat, does this negotiation allow you to be more assertive and boost your chances of walking away with exactly what you need? If you’re a warrior, do you need to consider toning down your approach and building the relationship? It definitely is not always an easy black and white negotiation.
Related: Persuading People
Take the three-step approach of assessing your negotiating style, the situation, and your strategy, you will be more likely to get what you ask for, and more.